When our grandparents and parents were growing up, both romantic relationships and friendships were not influenced by social media. Cell phones were just rolling out, let alone texting. Most teenagers have probably experienced their family members telling them that if they wanted to get into contact with a friend or someone that they liked, they would have to wait for a phone call on a landline, or simply walk to their house.
Today, we don’t experience relationships the same way. As technology has evolved, so has our means of communication. Things like tone are never clear through a text message. How negatively does social media impact our relationships?
Parents didn’t have Snapchat, not understanding the anxiety of being left on read, but as teens today, these gaps create an abyss between friends and partners. This is now a struggle for teens.
On Snapchat, you are able to see people’s locations, when they were last on Snapchat, and their snapscore, directly
telling you how many people they have been snapping if they are not answering you. This has ruined a lot of present day relationship expectations. Many people find themselves checking when the person they like was last active, or if their snapscore went up, miserably wondering if there is someone else. Why do we play these games? Isn’t it time to lock into a mature relationship? After all, we are high schoolers.
Comparatively to only being able to use a landline, or even a flip phone to text, always expecting a “snap” from someone you like is not natural, and can create unrealistic expectations. Furthermore, a lack of snapchatting often does not mean they do not like you. This being said, it is so hard to remember that as Snapchat and social media is normalized these days. While contacting people using Snapchat is a whole issue in itself, seeing couples posting, or even posting your significant other can also cause issues.
As social media is the “norm” for teenagers in current society, you may find yourself starting and ending your day scrolling on apps like TikTok and Instagram. People often like to post their relationships online.
The issues with constantly posting your significant other, which (in theory) should not be a problem, leads to judgment and insecurities from others.
One of the worst parts about social media is how much it reduces reality. You may be scrolling and see someone’s seemingly “perfect,” relationship, so then you expect those actions from your significant other. However, what you don’t know is that those are only the happy parts. Every relationship has their struggles, and you may not see that
all the time as the bad times don’t often make the Instagram cut. Everyone is different and goes about relationships differently, and puts in effort differently.
“This can cause teenagers to feel inadequate and become engrossed in trying to fit in within the social media world,” social worker Emily Hancock said.
This being said, social media can really take away from the important parts to a relationship, like quality time. To many, the most important aspects of a relationship are the little or tangible things, like written letters, reassurance, and flowers.
Finally, I think it is important to try to pay attention to reality and not compare yourself or your relationship to social media, as hard as it can be. It is important to take time with your significant other, communicating, and having standards for them, but not unrealistic expectations. After all, we are just teenagers trying to get through high school.
